So it is the Easter long weekend and time to do the trek up to spend the time with my family. But this year for Easter I had decided I would get my family to do a few things I like to do. Watch a couple of musical movies and hopefully get my parents to go to the gym... oh boy the later option has been near impossible to complete!
I arrived two days ago and boldly stated that I planned drag my parents to the gym... my mother laughed and gave me a glass of red wine and my father said he cannot work out too hard as he will have a heart attack!
Promptly forgetting the idea about the gym I proceeded to catch up with my family and it was during dinner that I remembered that I wanted to go to the gym the following day and mentioned it again to my parents. My mother topped up my wine glass and told me I was mad and my father then told me he had hurt his back and could only do some light exercise. Laughing at both of them I explained the exercise I had planned for both of them (me bossy who would have guessed?). My mother explained that she doesn't do exercise and only would go only if she could sit on a bike and that was it... she happened to mention she didn't plan to actually make the peddles move! I failed to notice that she filled my wine glass up again and of course I finished it without problem. Who knew it would be so difficult to get my parents to exercise.
Later that night and feeling slightly tipsy we were watching Victor/Victoria (yes playing the gay card got the move shown!) I was on my forth glass of wine and asked what time we planned to go to the gym. My mother with a sly smile said lets see how we feel in the morning. I think during the course of the film had an additional glass before bed and was well and truly enjoying the alcohol fueled buzz.
So waking from my drunken slumber I realised that I had a little bit of a hangover. Walking into the kitchen for breakfast my very clever mother knew that I was in absolute no mood for the gym and asked "what time are we going to the gym?" I replied that let's see how I feel later today. Of course there was no way I was going to go to the gym so my parents were off the hook!
The following day I woke hangover free and walked into the kitchen declaring to my parents that I wanted to go to the gym. Once again my mother whinged she didn't want to go and my father explained he had pulled some muscles in his leg. They explained that they would go but only after lunch.
During lunch my parents went to their wine collection and selected a great bottle of red to have with the meal. Of course once it was open we all had a glass and then finished off the bottle. But the problem with having wine with lunch is it makes you very sleepy in the afternoon. Realising I had two glasses of wine it would not be wise to go to the gym... explaining this to my mother she said "Yes we shouldn't work out after wine and I am not going to the gym if it is full of muscle men!"...
I think it was easier coming out to my parents than making them step foot in a gym!
Saturday, 23 April 2011
Monday, 18 April 2011
Burnt finger...
So okay I have recently been doing some renovations on my apartment. Making my place feel like a home. I had a plethora of tradesman come through my apartment working on various elements to remove what was old and make it new again. Now in my twisted mind I was hoping that all the tradesmen would be hot... and let me assure you they were DEFINITELY not!
After having almost my entire apartment renovated I thought it was about time that I would do some of it myself, paint. Now how could I go wrong simply painting the walls. It is an easy task, simply pick the colour, buy a paint brush and cover the walls.
Well that is the first problem picking the colour! I knew I wanted white walls for my bathroom. But I didn't realise there are about a hundred different shades of white. Some requiring under coats, some requiring staining and all requiring preparation of the wall. Now what is this preparation of the walls? Apparently it was wiping down the walls with sugar soap! Wow you learn something new everyday... soap for walls... who knew?!
White paint, sugar soap and brushes bought I headed back to my apartment to set about painting my horrible Homer Simpson yellow walls, Ice White. Shouldn't take too long or be life threatening right? Wrong! While washing the walls I noticed a bump in the walls and proceeded to sand it. Upon sanding it I noticed I exposed some copper wires. Not knowing what these wires were I went up for a closer inspection and touched them... my stomach cramped up as it felt that I had been kicked. I moved away and the tingling sensation slowly dissipated. I just gave myself one mighty shock and oh boy it didn't feel good! So deciding I should take a break. I called an electrician to come over and remove the exposed wire. Great this couldn't be done until Monday. But I was determined to paint this bathroom even if it was going to kill me!
Ladder set up, walls washed, area around exposed wire being avoided like the plague! Now lets get this wall painted... shouldn't take longer than an hour. So I thought. First coat of paint took longer than three hours and going up and down the ladder was exhausting. There was absolutely no way I was going to finish this bathroom in one day!
Day two my legs ached, my butt ached, my back ached and my finger was burnt from where I touched the live wire. But I was determined to get this damn bathroom done! But up that ladder I went to do the second coat of paint... and oh boy were these fumes starting to get to me!
Three hours later the bathroom was finished, I was walking around the apartment like a little old lady, my back was sore, my hand ached, my head was spinning and I still had my damn burnt finger... but my bathroom was done!
Who knew that this gay man who takes four days to assemble an Ikea bookcase that is slightly bent and does not resemble the picture on the box could paint a bathroom... and almost kill himself in the process!
The electrician removed the wire on Monday... and oh boy was he hot! But I didn't have sex with him like in the movies!
After having almost my entire apartment renovated I thought it was about time that I would do some of it myself, paint. Now how could I go wrong simply painting the walls. It is an easy task, simply pick the colour, buy a paint brush and cover the walls.
Well that is the first problem picking the colour! I knew I wanted white walls for my bathroom. But I didn't realise there are about a hundred different shades of white. Some requiring under coats, some requiring staining and all requiring preparation of the wall. Now what is this preparation of the walls? Apparently it was wiping down the walls with sugar soap! Wow you learn something new everyday... soap for walls... who knew?!
White paint, sugar soap and brushes bought I headed back to my apartment to set about painting my horrible Homer Simpson yellow walls, Ice White. Shouldn't take too long or be life threatening right? Wrong! While washing the walls I noticed a bump in the walls and proceeded to sand it. Upon sanding it I noticed I exposed some copper wires. Not knowing what these wires were I went up for a closer inspection and touched them... my stomach cramped up as it felt that I had been kicked. I moved away and the tingling sensation slowly dissipated. I just gave myself one mighty shock and oh boy it didn't feel good! So deciding I should take a break. I called an electrician to come over and remove the exposed wire. Great this couldn't be done until Monday. But I was determined to paint this bathroom even if it was going to kill me!
Ladder set up, walls washed, area around exposed wire being avoided like the plague! Now lets get this wall painted... shouldn't take longer than an hour. So I thought. First coat of paint took longer than three hours and going up and down the ladder was exhausting. There was absolutely no way I was going to finish this bathroom in one day!
Day two my legs ached, my butt ached, my back ached and my finger was burnt from where I touched the live wire. But I was determined to get this damn bathroom done! But up that ladder I went to do the second coat of paint... and oh boy were these fumes starting to get to me!
Three hours later the bathroom was finished, I was walking around the apartment like a little old lady, my back was sore, my hand ached, my head was spinning and I still had my damn burnt finger... but my bathroom was done!
Who knew that this gay man who takes four days to assemble an Ikea bookcase that is slightly bent and does not resemble the picture on the box could paint a bathroom... and almost kill himself in the process!
The electrician removed the wire on Monday... and oh boy was he hot! But I didn't have sex with him like in the movies!
Tuesday, 12 April 2011
Staying Positive
The gay community have really had it hard. Being treated differently to the rest of society, not being recognised or accepted, continual humiliation and insult and not to mention the constant stereotyping. So sometimes it can just get a little hard and tough to keep positive...
For a group of individuals who are still trying to define themselves and find a place in general community, the support they show for one another at times can be varying. With great pride they raise the flag and show their compassion at Mardi Gras. But once the flag has been lowered and the outfits packed away you are able to see what the real community resembles and sometimes it is great but other times you can see there are people who are still dealing with the affects of the disrespect experienced living as a gay or lesbian in the greater community.
As a gay man there sure have been times where it has been tough, really tough. I was bullied at high school for being gay, I have been the victim of homophobic attacks in the street, I have heard negative stereotyping of gays and lesbians by individuals, experienced total disrespect in the workplace for being gay and even received negative opinion from friends and family. But I still keep positive that I can make a difference.
For some people I can see why this would become too much. Having to continually fight against what is wrong and hope that eventually it should get better, it all can become a little hard to believe. After such a hard and continual struggle some individuals do start to take a stance of self preservation and try to distance themselves from the general gay community, as they don't want to be seen as any of the negative stereotypes, myself included. For a while I didn't want to be seen as a member of the gay community as I too thought it was a bunch of dirty perverts as that was the stereotype. Fine I don't see myself as a dirty pervert and being gay definitely doesn't mean I am, but I am a gay man who does want to be treated equally. So by aligning myself with the gay community I can hopefully achieve the equal rights that I deserve.
Stereotyping is really quite hard for the gay community as you are having to breakdown perceived barrier. For me I definitely stereotype and as a gay man it is rather strange that I do so seeing that I have to continually fight against the stereotypes that are placed on me.
Sometimes it can just get all too hard and you want to curl up into a ball and wish things could be different. Why was I born gay? Why am I not treated equally as everyone else? Why do I have to continually stand up for myself? But at the end of the day these things do not really get me down. It just bothers me from time to time that things are different but I do believe that with times things will change and for the better. For the time being what I do is to stay positive and hope that things would eventually get better.
For a group of individuals who are still trying to define themselves and find a place in general community, the support they show for one another at times can be varying. With great pride they raise the flag and show their compassion at Mardi Gras. But once the flag has been lowered and the outfits packed away you are able to see what the real community resembles and sometimes it is great but other times you can see there are people who are still dealing with the affects of the disrespect experienced living as a gay or lesbian in the greater community.
As a gay man there sure have been times where it has been tough, really tough. I was bullied at high school for being gay, I have been the victim of homophobic attacks in the street, I have heard negative stereotyping of gays and lesbians by individuals, experienced total disrespect in the workplace for being gay and even received negative opinion from friends and family. But I still keep positive that I can make a difference.
For some people I can see why this would become too much. Having to continually fight against what is wrong and hope that eventually it should get better, it all can become a little hard to believe. After such a hard and continual struggle some individuals do start to take a stance of self preservation and try to distance themselves from the general gay community, as they don't want to be seen as any of the negative stereotypes, myself included. For a while I didn't want to be seen as a member of the gay community as I too thought it was a bunch of dirty perverts as that was the stereotype. Fine I don't see myself as a dirty pervert and being gay definitely doesn't mean I am, but I am a gay man who does want to be treated equally. So by aligning myself with the gay community I can hopefully achieve the equal rights that I deserve.
Stereotyping is really quite hard for the gay community as you are having to breakdown perceived barrier. For me I definitely stereotype and as a gay man it is rather strange that I do so seeing that I have to continually fight against the stereotypes that are placed on me.
Sometimes it can just get all too hard and you want to curl up into a ball and wish things could be different. Why was I born gay? Why am I not treated equally as everyone else? Why do I have to continually stand up for myself? But at the end of the day these things do not really get me down. It just bothers me from time to time that things are different but I do believe that with times things will change and for the better. For the time being what I do is to stay positive and hope that things would eventually get better.
Thursday, 7 April 2011
Making a difference...
With the recent passing on Elizabeth Taylor it really made me sit down and think. For someone who was really famous for her acting, looks and love of diamonds it surprised me that she became a determined advocate for HIV/AIDS and the gay cause. She had already made a name for herself and then she changed direction by raising awareness about the disease but also gay rights became the focus for the last remaining years of her life... almost 25 years of hard determined work.
So this makes me ask with life do we really just want to work for money or make a difference?
For a long time my focus in life as been toward making money, buying an apartment, living the lifestyle that is deemed appropriate by the media and buy everything I need and quite often don't want.
So is this what I really want? Now that I have the apartment, a good career, a car, various objects and designer things... is this as good as it gets? The answer is no. Really at the end of the day these things do not make a huge statement for me. What would give me more meaning and a sense of fulfilment would be that I have been able to achieve make a real difference in someone's life in a positive way. But how and where can I do this???
Being a gay man isn't easy. There is the personal question of ones sexuality that you become aware and question at a very early age. The continual bullying and harassment while at high school does not make things any easier if anything a lot worse. The affects of this torment you have to deal with afterwards as well as coming out to your loved ones. Then finally accepting your sexuality and trying to find and define yourself as a person. Not to mention trying to find a partner, maintain a career and deal with all the other aspects of every day life.
So how would I like to make a difference? Well this is a hard question that I am not sure I can immediately answer without sounding conceited. I guess one thing that would have made a little difference in my life earlier on would have been that life does get easier as a gay man. It isn't always going to be this difficult and hard. The hardest part is coming to terms with your sexuality and sure with the bullying at high school it doesn't make it easy. But once you get through all of this and living your life as an proud gay man things start to change. It does get better!
So this makes me ask with life do we really just want to work for money or make a difference?
For a long time my focus in life as been toward making money, buying an apartment, living the lifestyle that is deemed appropriate by the media and buy everything I need and quite often don't want.
So is this what I really want? Now that I have the apartment, a good career, a car, various objects and designer things... is this as good as it gets? The answer is no. Really at the end of the day these things do not make a huge statement for me. What would give me more meaning and a sense of fulfilment would be that I have been able to achieve make a real difference in someone's life in a positive way. But how and where can I do this???
Being a gay man isn't easy. There is the personal question of ones sexuality that you become aware and question at a very early age. The continual bullying and harassment while at high school does not make things any easier if anything a lot worse. The affects of this torment you have to deal with afterwards as well as coming out to your loved ones. Then finally accepting your sexuality and trying to find and define yourself as a person. Not to mention trying to find a partner, maintain a career and deal with all the other aspects of every day life.
So how would I like to make a difference? Well this is a hard question that I am not sure I can immediately answer without sounding conceited. I guess one thing that would have made a little difference in my life earlier on would have been that life does get easier as a gay man. It isn't always going to be this difficult and hard. The hardest part is coming to terms with your sexuality and sure with the bullying at high school it doesn't make it easy. But once you get through all of this and living your life as an proud gay man things start to change. It does get better!
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